The nurse waddled across the floor, a Krispy Kreme in one hand and another half stuffed in her mouth. Ruby Acres had no trouble grabbing her.
“Excuse me, Nurse, but we’ve been here almost two hours. M’daughter’s still bleedin’.” She scowled.
The nurse huffed. “Has she passed out er died?”
“Well, no.”
“Let me know if she does, ‘specially the last un so we can mark her off the list. Can’t waste nobody’s time.” The nurse turned to disappear through a door.
She stood there a moment and watched the door swing shut, finally walking back over to Vista Kay sitting in a chair, holding yet another cloth to her bleeding foot. “Those people.” She huffed.
“It’s okay, Mama. I’m sure there are others ahead of me hurt a whole lot worse.”
“Worse?” The old woman plopped in the chair beside her. “Vista Kay, you can see the bone.”
“Don’t remind me, Mama.” Vista Kay held up her free hand. “I’m queasy enough as it is.”
Her mother brightened. “Do ya think yer gonna pass out? That’d get us in quicker.” Her daughter shot her a look then went back to putting pressure on her foot. “Could ya fake it? Squat down, hold yer breath and stand up real fast…”
“Mama, I am not gonna try an’ make m’self pass out just to get us in to see the doctor quicker. What’s yer hurry anyways? It’s not like either one of us has lots ta do other than clean up the mess I made.”
“I jest hates awaitin’.” She said. “If this was Salem Hospital, Doctor Dan would never make ya wait this long.”
“I’m sure he wouldn’t.” Vista rolled her eyes.
“He’s a good doctor.” Her mother thought out loud. “Too bad we cain’t see if he’s available.”
“Mama, I know you live fer ‘Days of Our Lives’, but let’s be honest, even if Daniel Jonas was a real person, I’m not sa sure that havin’ a crotch that enters the room ten seconds before he does makes him a good doctor.”
“Depends on what ya need fixin’.” Ruby Acres smiled. Vista couldn’t help herself, and laughed along with her.
“Is that seat taken?” A handsome middle-aged man with a bloody cloth pressed to his forehead asked.
Vista and her mother looked up. “Uhh…”
“Ya’ll look like your having a lot more fun than the people over there are.” He pointed to a group on the other side of the ER. “They’re throwing up, coughing and at least one needs a diaper change. Not exactly a lot of fun.”
“We’re just bleedin’ ta death quietly over here.” Vista smiled. “Have a seat.”
“Thank you.”
The old woman looked at him closely. “I know you.” She finally said.
“Yes, Mrs. Acres. I’m Thatcher Tate, the detective that was assigned to your…grandson’s case.”
“Right. Right.” She smiled. “Sorry. The purple forehead an’ the bloody nose threw me. You get in a fight?”
He smiled. “No ma’am, just a stupid accident.”
“Us, too.” She said. “Well, my daughter was stupid, not me.”
“Thanks, Mama.” Vista looked up from her foot. “I’m Vista Kay Moretz an’ this is my Mama, Ruby Acres.”
“Oh yes, I remember.” He said. “How could I forget?”
“I’m sure.” The old woman smiled. “I ain’t ever day a body gets accused a making a bail a hay out of a neighbor.”
“Even if Ronnie had done that, it would have been an accident.” Detective Tate said. “Unfortunately, whoever killed poor Myrtle Lewis did it quite deliberately and was almost successful at making it look like your Grandson had. Someone who probably knew his history…” the Detective explained.
“Well, that could be almost anyone in Johnson County.” Vista peeked at her foot and scrunched her face. “It’s hard to keep much quiet around here.”
“It just’sa mean that people won’t let poor Ronnie ferget sumpthin he did when he was fifteen. He fessed right up to it, an’ served his time.” Ruby Acres moaned. “He kilt that one man ten year ago. It ain’t like he spends his free time takin potshots at people going in an’ outta the Wal-Mart, whether they deserve it er not. An a ‘course nobody liked that man he kilt anyway.”
“There were extenuating circumstances. Ronnie was young, and what happened wasn’t planned, but you’re right, Mrs. Acres people should understand that although he did something terrible, he showed much more maturity and character than the victim simply by admitting to what happened and accepting the punishment.”
“I allus thought so.” The old woman smiled. “And you kin call me Maw Maw, ever body does.”
“Thank you.” He smiled. “Call me Thatch, all my friends do.”
“So Thatch. How’d ya bonk yer noggin’?”
“It’s embarrassing.”
“Can’t be that bad.” Maw Maw pointed at her daughter. “Vista saw a mouse and dropped a ten pound can a black olives she jus’ opened on her foot.”
“Mama!”
“I tell ya, she was a screaming at that critter, hoppin’ all over the kitchen a spurtin’ blood ever where.”
Vista looked up. “We left such a mess. I should call Brod, he’ll come home and think Ronnie parked the columbine on us in the kitchen.”
“Aw, he’ll probably jus’ think Arzella Tater dropped by and I kilt her.” Maw Maw turned to the detective and smiled. “Nobody likes her neither.” She laughed and put up her hands. “Afore ya scold me, Vista Kay. I done texted Ronnie.”
Vista Kay looked up from putting pressure on her foot. “You’ll have to forgive my Mama. She gets a little carried away sometimes.”
“No worries.”
“Honey…” Maw Maw took a hanky out of her purse and looked at Thatcher Tate. “Ya gots a little blood a dryin’ on yer cheek.” She spit on the hanky and rubbed the man’s cheek.
“He’s not six, Mama.” Vista scolded her.
“There, sept fer the swollen honker an’ a head that looks like broken carniv’l glass, yer all cleaned up.” Maw put the tissue back in her purse.
“Thank you.”
“What’ja do anyway?” Maw Maw had to ask again.
“He said it was embarassin’, Mama.” Vista chided. “Leave the poor man alone.”
“Actually, Mrs. Moretz. At least you had the excuse of a mouse for your accident. I brushed and spit and splat my head on the mirror over the sink. The last I remember as the ambulance driver was shutting the doors was the owner of the motel screaming ‘Who’s gonna pay for this? I not pay for this!”
“Yer a stayin at the Mountain Empire?” Maw Maw said.
“How’d you know?”
Vista looked up at him. “Fifty fifty shot detective. The only other place in the county is the Americourt and the owner is some company in cyber land.” Vista smiled.
“You’ve been here since afore Thanksgivin’. You been staying in a motel all this time?” Maw Maw asked.
“Well, yes, ma’am.” He answered. “The state’s covering the bill until I get this case solved.”
“Don’t cha miss yer fam’ly?” Maw Maw asked.
“Well, my little boy’s with me. I put him in the local school.”
“You got a little boy?” Vista smiled.
“Tucker. He’s six, first year of school. I couldn’t stand to have him start and me not be there.”
“And yer wife?” Maw Maw kept it up.
“She…uh…” Tate looked down. “She passed away a few years ago.”
“That’s sa sad.” Maw Maw put her hand on his forearm. “Vista Kay is dee-vorced.”
“Mama!”
“Well, ya are.” She whipped her head to her daughter.
“We are not at one a them speed datin’ things. Let the poor man bleed in peace.” Vista mumbled a little louder than she wanted to.
“Fine, Vista Kay. I’m just a makin’ conversation.” Maw Maw looked down at her daughter’s foot. “It don’ look like it’s a spurtin’ like it was.”
“Just dribbles now.” Vista looked at the towel. “I could use a new piece a gauze er something. I’m not for sure if I’m still a bleedin’ or just squeezin’ the juice out a this thing.”
“Let me see if I kin roust a nurse away from the donut cart.” Maw Maw stood up, taking a look a Thatcher’s forehead. “Looks like yer due a new’n, too. Let Maw Maw get some tails in gear. I’ll be right back.”
One with a hand on their forehead, the other with a hand on her foot watched they old woman walk off. Vista turned back to her foot. “Just let me bleed ta death now, Lord.”
“What did you say?”
“Nothin’” She smiled at the handsome man under the bloody rag. “I apologize for my mother. I keep usin’ the she’s 86 excuse but the truth is she’s about as subtle as a polecat in a blender.”
Thatcher Tate leaned in. “I know your secret.”
“Why do I get the feelin’ organ chords should be poppin’ up in the music score just about now?” Vista smiled. “I don’ have any secrets, Detective Tate.”
“Thatch.” He smiled. “And yes you do.”
“I’m an open book, detective…Thatch.”
“So if I stood up and announced ‘Ladies and Gentlemen, Darlene Reed!’ and pointed at you, no one in this room would be shocked?”
“Course not, yer bleedin’ with a concussion. They’d just assume you was out of your mind.” She giggled.
“Then you do have a secret.” He taunted her.
“I do not.” She insisted. “Every body pretty much knows I’ve done a little writing.”
“But they don’t know your nomme de plume, do they?” He smiled.
“Shh! Somebody’ll think your serious an’ I’ll never live it down.”
“Because it’s true.”
“You wanna another bonk and the head?” She asked him.
He smiled. “Seriously, does any one know?”
Vista sat up in the chair. “Mama and Brod, and stop actin’ like I’m some literary legend, Thatcher Tate, Southern fiction is hot these days.” She explained. “I got lucky, I’m a woman born and raised in Tennessee. That’s kind of like my eyes are blue.”
“Brown.” Thatcher Tate smiled. “Your eyes are brown.”
“Vista Moretz!” A woman with kittens in surgical masks on her scrubs bellowed.
“That’s me.” Vista stood.
“Vista Moretz!” She yelled, more impatiently this time.
“Coming!” Vista snapped back. She took a small hobble and the room started to spin.
“Vista Moretz, are you still here?” She heard someone spit.
She heard a voice she recognized yell, “She’s the one a passing out ya fool!”
Vista saw bright lights and colors. The temperature got very hot and then very cool. She felt someone grab her.
“Be careful Vista, honey. You’ll fall an’ break yer neck.”
Maw Maw came into focus, and Vista quickly grabbed her for support. “Ooh, I musta tripped on…” She looked around. The place was familiar but she couldn’t quite place it. “Where are we?”
“In Salem, a course.” Her mother pointed. “Look, it’s the Brady Pub! Let’s go have us a bowl a calm chowder.”
Before Vista could stop her, the old lady had dragged her in the door. The place was full. They stood in the door and looked for a table.
Maw Maw grabbed Vista’s elbow. “Look, Vista. Ain’t that Brady Black a sittin’ at the bar?”
“I’m not sure.” She tried not to stare. “I’m not used to seein’ him with his shirt on.”
“I’ll go ast him to take it off.” The old woman started to head right over.
Vista grabbed her by the skirt. “Mama, don’t you dare.”
“Ruby Acres!” A voice called from the other side of the pub. A stately woman rushed to Maw Maw and hugged her.
“Caroline Brady!” Maw Maw grinned as they patted each other on the back.
“Ruby it’s been too long!” She said holding the woman and smiling brightly.
“You two know each other?” Vista was shocked.
“Know each other?” Carolina looked at her. “We’ve been neighbors for years, Vista. Are you alright?”
Maw Maw pointed at her temple and made little circles. “Vista you remember Caroline Brady, don’cha? You dated her son Bo all through high school.”
“I did?”
Caroline nodded her head. “Of course then he met Hope, and then he met Carly…then Hope again…”
“An’ Billie…” Maw Maw chimed in. “…then back to Hope…then back to Carly.”
Vista Kay remembered. “Wasn’t there a Gina in there somewhere?”
“She turned out to be Hope, too. It’s a pattern.” Caroline shook her head. “We miss you around here Ruby. How have you been?”
“Aw, doin’ jes fine, Caroline.” Maw Maw smiled. “Say you still passin’ off Campbell’s Chunky as homemade?”
“Shhh!” She covered her laugh with her hand. “People will hear you.”
“We’ll have us a couple a bowls an’ a table if ya got ‘em.”
“Sure, Ruby. You and Vista come right over here.” Caroline ushered them to a table in the corner, where they could see the door. “Two bowls of clam chowder comin’ right up.”
“Soon as it calms down, Caroline, come an’ ketch up with us.” Maw Maw took a seat. “Well, sit Vista Kay. Don’t stand around like ya got no common sense. Sit!”
Vista did as she was told, but couldn’t help looking around. She felt a little strange and couldn’t quite figure out what was going on. She recognized so many people, and her mother seemed right at home.
A handsome man at the next table smiled at them and then returned to his brief case. Vista almost died of embarrassment when her mother reached across the table and smacked the man on the back of the head.
“Ow!” He said in a very definitive British accent.
“Elvis John Dimera!” Her mother snapped. “Shame on you!”
“Do I know you, Madam?” He said rubbing the back of his head.
“I swan.” She said. “Ever time I see you, I think a your sweet Mama, jest a shakin’ her head back and forth an’ sayin’ ‘Mean, mean, mean.’” The old woman picked a spoon up off the table and pointed it at him. “Somebody oughta turn you over their knee and give you a good spankin’”.
“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He said.
“Mama,” Vista put her head in her hands, shielding her face from anyone who might notice. “You’re embarassin’ me.”
Ruby Acres kept right on. “Oh sure, you’re good lookin’ an’ all, but ya don’t take yer shirt off nearly enough…”
“I beg your pardon…” E.J. said.
“Ever body knows what you been a pullin’…” The old woman made little quotation marks in the air. “…all fer the sake of yer kids. Mean, mean, mean…”
E.J. squinted his eyes. “Did Samantha put you up to this?”
“P’shaw.” Ruby waved her hand at him. “Sami dint put me up ta nothin’ and you leave that poor girl alone.”
“She shot me in the head!” He whispered loudly.
Maw Maw leaned in close. “If’n ya ask me she shoulda aimed that gun about two feet lower. I’ma tellin’ you ta back off. She gots Rafe now. Sure he’s hotter’n Texas Pete on a japaleno pepper but he’s borin’ as hell. Ain’t that punishment enough? And makin’ a second one? Elvis John, two of ‘ems just inhumane.”
“Do I know you?” He scowled at her.
Vista turned around to face the man. “Mr. Dimera, please forgive my mother. She’s 86 years old, and tends to get a little carried away.”
“Don’t apol’gize fer me, Vista Kay. If I step on his toes, he’ll jes’ call his Daddy an’ cry like a baby.” Maw Maw crossed her arms and stared him down.
“Now look hear, Madam…”
“And what yer a doin’ to Nicole, I swan it’s just meaner’n a strip-ed snake in a box ExLax.”
“She faked a pregnancy, kidnapped my child and tried to pass the child off as her own!” He defended oh so aristocratically.
“Like you didn’t! Yer just embarrassed cause you was dumb enough ta fall fer it. You got to admit Elvis, you hit the jackpot at the two for the price of stupid on that one.” Maw Maw smiled. “Now makin’ her give up that hunky Brady Black…”
E.J. sat up straight. “Now see here…”
“No you see here…” Maw Maw spewed. “Makin her ditch him ta marry you just so she kin see those sweet li’l kids, and so you kin piss the bejesus outta Sami ‘n’ Rafe. Sometimes you kin jes make the Devil look like homecomin’ queen at a pity party.”
“Once again, Madam.” E.J. tried to return to his work. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”
“Once agin, in honor of yer dear sainted mother…” Maw Maw shook her head back and forth. “Mean, mean, mean!”
E.J. slammed his papers back down on the table. “You keep mentioning my mother. Do you know her?”
“Of course, I know’d yer mama.” Maw Maw smiled. “She twernt much ta look at, but she had a good heart.”
“You’ve seen her?” E.J. was suddenly just a little excited. “When?”
“Oh, at 12:30 ever onct an’ a while.” Ruby Acres looked at him. “Call Tom Casiello over at “The Young ‘n’ the Restless”. He kin hook you up.”
E.J. gathered up his papers, quickly stuffed them into his briefcase and dialed his cell phone. “Father, I need to speak with you immediately…”
Maw Maw grinned and waved as he headed for the door. “Told ya. Big baby.” She looked around the Pub. “Wonder where Caroline is with our chowder? Probab’ly had to run to the grocery store ‘n’ get s’more cans…here it comes.” She smiled at the young blond man coming to them with a tray.
“Mrs. Acres, Ms. Moretz my grandmother said to enjoy the chowder. She’s a little busy right now, but she’ll come out and chat when she has a chance.”
“She busy in the kitchen?” Maw Maw said as she looked hungrily at the bowl placed in front of her.
He shook his head. “On computer switching paternity tests.”
“Girl’s gotta have a hobby. Thank ye Will.”
“No problem, and she sent you these Irish coffees, as well.”
“Will?” Vista suddenly remembered. “How’s your little brother doin’?”
Will Horton smiled. “Much better. Thank you for asking.”
Maw Maw took a big slurp of her coffee. “I jes feel so bad, Little Johnny almost getting’ both his eyes poked out. It’s jest awful. Next thin’ ya know poor Allie will be getting that disease that bald Miss Delaware has. Did you watch Miss Americer?”
“No, ma’am.”
“Aw she was she sweet. She shoulda won.” She sipped her coffee again. “Mmm, Caroline makes these the way I like ‘em, light on the coffee, heavy on the Irish. You wanna sit a spell with us Will?”
“Oh thanks, but I have to go study with Gabby.” He said
“That’sa sweet.” Vista smiled at him. “Ya’ll study hard and have a good time.”
Before he turned away, Maw Maw grabbed his arm. “Will honey, afore ya run off I wanna teach ya a word that ‘parantly no one in Salem knows. Now repeats after me…con-dom….”
“Uhhh...” He said. “I have to go now.”
“Of course. Good seein’ you agin.” Vista nodded her head as Will Horton walked off with a strange look on his face.
“Touch-ee.” Maw Maw said. “I may need some more a this coffee, soon.”
A beautiful woman came to their table. “Maw Maw, Vista, I’m so glad you could meet me.” She took an empty seat and sat down.
“Carly, honey.” Maw Maw touched her hand. “Ya know alls ya gots to do is call.”
“Thank you.” She smiled.
Vista was having trouble wrapping her mind around all of this. “Carly Manning? You called us?”
“Well, yes. I called and said I needed to talk. You wanted me to meet you here. Did I misunderstand something?”
“No, no…I just…never mind.” Vista took another slug of her coffee.
“Now, sugar, what’s on yer mind?”
“What else?” Carly looked at Maw Maw.
“Bo Brady.” She said.
Carly nodded her head and tried to keep the tears back. “I don’t know what to do. Yes I do. I do know what to do, but that doesn’t make it any easier.”
“Face it, Carly. Bo an’ Hope are jes destined to be together…and break up…and get together agin.”
Vista looked at her. “Carly, I have to admit, that right now I’m more confused than Sarah Palin takin’ a grammar exam, but ya had to know when ya got involved with Bo Brady that it was always gonna end the way it did.”
“I know.” She held back a sigh and pushed the sugar dispenser around on the table a little bit.
“Face it.” Vista said firmly. “Getting involved with him was like watchin’ one of them Lifetime movies. As soon as ya turn it on you know by the end your gonna bawl your eyes out.”
“Mmm hmmm.” Maw Maw jumped right in. “When it’s over ya feel sa stupid fer getting involved in the first place, but at the same time you got what ya needed and it turns out it weren’t a silly waste a time after all.”
Carly looked up, forcing a little bit of a smile. “I needed him…and I think he needed me.”
“See?” Vista patted her hand. “It wasn’t a tragic waste a time. You had just come from that awful abusive marriage, and he was so hurt ‘n’ confused by the way Hope was a actin’. Who better to turn to than someone with a big heart and a lotta love to help ya heal and move on.”
“That’s the secret, Carly honey.” Maw Maw nodded. “Heal, now move on.”
“An’ you and Bo, it’ll be awkward fer a while, but yer always gonna be friends.” Vista Kay smiled as she looked at Carly. “That’s true love, the one that breaks your heart into a million pieces, but somehow is always there a rootin’ for ya to pick ‘em all up and put ‘em back together again.”
“You’re right, Vista Kay.” Carly smiled. “See I knew you’d know exactly what to say.”
“Now you buck up, Carly Manning.” Maw Maw shook her finger at her lovingly. “You’re jes’ fine. Ain’t no woman in this whole wide world needs a man to make ‘em whole.”
“There’s always been a man in my life.” Carly had to admit. “Somehow, I just don’t feel quite…what’s that awful cliché? Complete, I’ve always had to have a man in my life to feel complete.”
“Well, that’s just dumb.” Vista smiled. “Know what I need to feel complete? A good piece a cheesecake.”
“Cheesecake is good.” Maw Maw got that evil grin in her eyes. “But I has ta admit, a little beefcake ever once an’ a while don’ hurt.” She turned to the bar. “Hey Brady Black!”
“What?” The man turned around.
“It’s getting hot in here. Why don’tcha take yer shirt off?”
“Okay.” The man doffed his shirt, tossed it on the stool beside him and went back to his drink.
“That’s my problem.” Carly turned back to her friends after watching the show.
“You got the hots fer Brady Black?” Maw Maw whispered, hoping to get the scoop.
“Oh God no.” Carly slumped back in her chair. “Men, that’s my problem. All the men in this town are either married, in the closet or Roman Brady.”
“Well, if ya just have to have a man, Carly, why not start from scratch?” Vista said smiling at the young waitress as she brought them all more coffee.
“What have Stefano Dimera build me one?” Carly chuckled as she lifted the cup to her lips.
“Well, that’s always a possibility, but I recollect that never turns out well.” Vista nodded. “I was thinkin’ a younger man.” She leaned in and nodded toward the young good looking blonde boy/man on the other side of the pub.
Carly looked in the direction Vista nodded. Her eyes got big and she whipped her head back around. “Will Horton?”
“Oooh.” Maw Maw said swigging down her second coffee. “That’s a good idea.”
“He’s just seventeen!” Carly reminded them.
“So?” Maw Maw sat back. “Wait ‘til his eighteenth birthday, then grab him and screw him up yer way.”
The three ladies laughed. Maw took another swig of her coffee. “Carly honey, if nothin’ else…well jes remember “The Guiding Light”.
Carly thought a moment and one eyebrow crept up. “You know, for a self-centered booze hound, Nicole’s pretty hot.” Once again, the three women hooted.
Another jaw droppingly handsome man came in the door and grabbed their attention. He spotted them at the corner table and walked right over. “Carly, have you seen Melanie?”
“Daniel.” She said. “I’m sorry, but unfortunately I’m still not on our daughter’s list of people to check her schedule with.”
Vista put her hand on Carly’s wrist. “Honey, that’s gonna change, too. You just wait an’ see.”
Dr. Daniel Jonas smiled. “I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of meeting your lovely companions.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Carly said. “These are two of my dearest old friends. This is Vista Kay Moretz…”
Vista put out her hand and looked up smiling. “Not that old. Nice to meet ya.”
“I love the accent. Is that Moretz or Mor-etz?” The doctor flirted.
“The one syllable is fine.” Vista smiled as he released her hand. “We ain’t uppity like the other half of the family.”
“And this is Ruby Acres.” Carly motioned to the old woman, whose mouth was hanging open, staring.
“Mama!” Vista Kay put her hand under her mother’s chin and lifted her stare from what was at her eye level to the man’s face. “Carly’s tryin’ to introduce you to Doctor Dan.”
“Oh, yes.” Maw Maw finally snapped back to focus on the man’s glittery eyes. “Nice ta meet ya. Call me Maw Maw, ever body does.”
“A pleasure to meet you, Maw Maw. May I join you ladies a moment?” He asked.
“Please.” Maw Maw kicked out the fourth chair with her foot and slurped her coffee. “Ya know Doctor Dan, I has ta admit I dint like ya much at all at first.”
“Excuse me?” He said as he sat himself down.
“Face it, when you first showed up in Salem, you was jest an erection wif a stethoscope.” She prattled.
“Mama!” Vista chided her, as Carly put her hand to her mouth and tried not to laugh too hard.
“Now I has ta admit, you an’ Nathan Horton do know how a woman likes ta see a man—wet an’ dressed in a towel.” Maw Maw looked in the air and mused. “Then sweet li’l Carly here come back ta town and ya’ll had the fuss wif Melanie, such a purdy purdy girl, and all that stuff wif Chloe and li’l Parker.”
“You know about Chloe and the baby?” He said.
“This is Salem.” Maw Maw said. “Ever body knows. An’ in all that mess ya showed ya gots a heart, a won’rful heart even bigger than Dan, Jr. there.” She pointed below the table. “And that’s sayin’ sumpin.”
“Law, Mama!” Vista turned bright red and pushed her coffee to the other side of the table. “I ain’t been this embarrassed since Vonda Kay farted the exact moment they crowned her Miss Mountain Electric!”
“I think Vonda coulda been Miss Tennessee if it twernt fer that.” Maw Maw thought out loud. “It’s hard ta fergit a gassy beauty queen, n’matter how hard ya try.”
The door to Brady pub slammed. “Ruby Acres!” Came the shout from across the room.
Maw Maw stood up straight and glared. “Vivian Alamain!”
“I thought I smelled Southern fried Ben Gay.” Vivian took a step toward the table.
“I cain’t smell as bad as you look, Vivian. Where you been, in a casket on a deserted island er sumpthin?” She put her hand to her mouth as she sat down. “Oh right, you have.”
“Don’t you mock me you old crone!” She spit.
“Don’t go there, Vivian.” Maw Maw warned. “I know yer birthdate an’ I ain’t a feared ta use it.”
“How dare you!” Vivian took another step toward the table.
“Vivian…” Carly stepped in. “Just go away. Nobody here needs or wants you around.”
“Carly Manning when I want your two cents worth I’ll ask a married man your sleeping with.” Vivian smiled.
“That’s enough!” Vista said, slapping her hands down on the table and pushing herself up. “Mama, no more Irish coffee for you.”
She turned to Vivian Alamain. “And you!”
“Me?” The woman seemed surprised.
“I have had it with you. I oughta do as Mama keeps a threatenin’ and turn you right over my knee and give you a good spankin’!”
“You go girl!” They all heard shirtless Brady Black encourage from the bar.
“You touch me, Vista Kay Acres Moretz, and I’ll have you arrested for assault and battery.”
Vista put her hands on her hips. “Do it. I dare ya. I’d use your legal name but quite frankly if I did that would mean I care enough to acknowledge your existence.”
“Why you little…”
“Quiet, I’m not finished.” Vista took a step towards Vivian and pointed at Carly Manning. “First you steal this woman’s baby and raise him behind her back.”
“She wasn’t ready to be a mother.” Vivian said.
Vista took another step closer. “Then you bury her alive.”
“She got out didn’t she?” Vivian took a step backward.
“Oh, I am just getting’ started. You’ve switched eggs, manipulated Chloe into tryin’ to kill her or you, and if that wasn’t enough you give Melanie a poison comb for her wedding? Vivian, that wasn’t just wacko it was down right stupid!”
“What was up wif ‘at, Ms. Alamain? Acme all outta anvils ta drop on her head?”
“That’s Countess Alamain, to you old crone.”
“Theys one too many ‘O’s in ‘at title if’n ya ask me.” Maw Maw took a sip from Vista’s cup.
“And to top it all off ya don’t even have the God given sense to pick a hair color. What is that red? Rust? Prime rib?”
“You think a bottle blonde Ellie Mae Clampett scares me?” Vivian shot back.
“Bottle blonde? Your darn lucky I don’t make you prove the drapes match the curtains!”
“You first.” Alamain sneered.
“That does it!” Vista grabbed Vivian by the arm
“Unhand me!” Vivian slapped at Vista’s grip. “Gus! Gus, where are you?”
“Have you tried lookin’ in the closet?” Maw Maw said.
“I’m gonna do something some one should have done a long time ago.” Vista dragged a struggling Vivian to the corner. She pointed. “Now stick your nose in there, and stand until you stop actin’ like you’re from the planet Bitch.”
“I will not be treated like a child.” Vivian tried to turn away from her head being shoved in the corner.
“Then stop acting like one.” Vista finally shoved the woman’s nose in the corner, kicking her in the rump to get her to stand there. The room cheered. “Now don’t move until I tell ya to.”
Resigned, Vivian Alamain rubbed her sore tushy and stood with her nose in the corner.
“And don’t get tons of makeup on the wall, Vivian. Caroline just painted.” Vista said over her shoulder as she strutted with pride back to her table.
Brady Black got off his stool, put his hands on the bar and looked at Vista over his shoulder with a wry smile. “I’ve been a baaaad boy. I need a spanking.”
“Ya couldn’t handle it, honey.” She smiled as she walked past and took her seat.
Carly Manning looked at Vista with pride and disbelief. “Can I give you Stefano Dimera’s number?”
“Well now that’s takin ker of…” Maw Maw looked at Daniel Jonas. “Ya know Doctor Dan, it’s getting’ awful hot in here, why don’t ya take your shirt off?”
“What?” The man choked out a smile.
“Come on, hot stuff. Let’s get a gander at them pecs.” Maw Maw slurred just a little.
“A think you’ve had a little too much Irish with your coffee.” The doctor blushed and pushed the old woman’s cup, again, out of her reach.
“Ya know, I been wonderin’…” Maw Maw looked at the man.
“Oh, here we go…” Vista looked for something to stop her mother from blurting out whatever was coming next.
“You gots sech a fine, fine chest, Doc…”
“Well, thank you.” Jonas was embarrassed, but flattered.
“Sometimes ya got this fine hairy chest, an’ other times it still looks fine but clean as a whistle. What’s up, chil’? You gots a chest like the clapper, wax on, wax off…is it a lightin’ problem or cain’t cha make up yer mind? Now I like a man wif a little hair on his…”
“Mama…I think that’s enough.” Vista warned, red faced, as the rest of the table tried to stifle giggles.
“I’m jest a sayin’.” Maw Maw defended herself.”
The door to the Brady pub flew open again. In rushed Nathan Horton, wearing an ugly shirt and carrying an armload of Jack-in-the-Box carry out bags. He rushed straight to the table in the corner.
“Have you seen Melanie?” He puffed out of breath.
“Nathan, what’s with all the hamburgers?” Daniel asked.
“And that shirt?” Carly had to add.
“It’s looks like ya got locked in Forrest Gump’s closet an’ couldn’t get out.” Maw Maw said.
“Oh.” Nathan smiled. “I got a commercial. I thought it might impress Melanie.”
“Nathan,” Vista said. “You gotta back off that girl, just a teensy bit.”
“But I love her, and I know she loves me.” He said.
“Sure, honey.” Vista smiled. “We all know that, but she’s so torn up right now. Just back off a bit, prove to her you’re the right man, the best man by just standin’ off to the side, just far enough outta sight so she still knows yer there, until she’s strong enough to be weak again.”
“Vista’s right, Nathan.” Carly nodded. “Give her some space. She’ll come around.”
“But I…” Nathan started to say. “I guess the Pandora Jeweler’s spot won’t work either.”
“I saw that.” Daniel piped up. “You were mackin’ on another chick in that one, dude. That never works; been there, done that…”
“Nathan Horton, you just calm down.” Maw Maw stood up, if a little wobbly, from the table. “You need a li’l distraction.”
“Distraction?”
“How ‘bout this?” Maw Maw put one hand behind Nathan’s head and one on his backside and pulled him into a kiss.
Nathan struggled a minute, then let go of the hamburgers and moved Maw Maw’s other hand to his butt.
Jack-in-the-Box rained down over the table, knocking coffee cups to the floor. Vista jumped up from the table to avoid splashing coffee and spilling hamburgers.
“Careful now.” She heard someone say as she slipped and fell backwards to the floor. The room started spinning. The air went hot and then cold.
“Vista?” She heard a familiar voice say.
“Ma’am? It’s okay, I’m a doctor.”
Vista opened her eyes. It took a moment to focus. She put her hand to her head. “Did I hit my head?”
“I don’ think so, honey.” Maw Maw was holding her hand. “But’cha passed out.” She leaned in closer. “Tol’ya it’d get us in here quicker.”
Vista sat up on the paper sheet. “Where am I?”
A man in a white smock flicked a pen light thing in her eyes. “You had a little accident and lost a little blood. Your in the emergency room.”
“I’m not in Salem?” Vista asked.
Maw Maw took her hand. “Course not, honey. Yer in Mountain City, whar we been almost ALL DAY.” She aimed at the doctor, who ignored her.
“Then we didn’t go to the Brady Pub?”
“You musta hit yer head, Vista. We been right here.”
Vista shook herself a little, and then winced as the doctor stuck a needle in her foot. She looked down at the gapping slash and back up. “I just slipped on a hamburger. How did that happen?”
“What?” Maw Maw had a look of concern on her face. “Vista Kay? What are you talkin’ about?”
“Never mind.” She said. “It must have been a dream. It was so real. You were there with me.”
“At the Brady Pub?” Vista nodded her head. “In Salem?”
“And Doctor Dan, and Carly Manning…”
“And my sweet little Nathan?” Maw Maw hoped.
“Yes, you and he were…never mind…oh Law! I dreamed of Vivian Alamain….”
